The Titans Get Trolled
by Aura Master Fox
Summary: The Titan's world is turned upside down when a mysterious girl appears and claims to be a Titan. A strange voice provides unwanted and grammatically incorrect narration, and the world slowly begins to go mad. Can the Titans return their world to normal, or will the Mary Sue's mere presence corrupt the universe itself?
1. Chapter 1: A Sue Appears!

_This is the beginning of my new series "The Titans Get Trolled", a deconstruction and parody of trollfics set in the Teen Titans universe, complete with a Mary Sue character and troll narration in bolded letters._

_REMEMBER: THE MISSPELLINGS AND GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THE SUE'S DIALOGUE AND THE TROLL NARRATION ARE DELIBERATE!_

Chapter 1: A Sue Appears!

* * *

It was a normal day at Titans Tower. Robin was checking the computers, Cyborg and Beast Boy were playing video games, Raven was meditating, and Starfire was playing with Silkie. There was no crime that day, and all was right in Jump City.

Cyborg raises his controller in victory. "Yes! I win again!"

Beast Boy sulks. "You got lucky that time..."

Cyborg grins in response. "That makes the score 17 to 5. Care for another round?"

Beast Boy grips his controller and stares at the screen with determination in his eyes. "Let's play."

Beast Boy and Cyborg focus intently on their game, not looking away from the screen or blinking. Robin looks up from his computers and addresses the other Titans.

"Well, it's 4:30, and nobody's tried to attack the city, so it looks like we have a day off. Anyone up for a movie?"

Starfire perks up. "Oh, a movie sounds most wonderful! Whatever did you have in mind?"

Robin scratched his head. "Well, _Return of the Mist Ninja_ came out yesterday, and the trailers looked pretty good. What do you guys think?"

Before Starfire could answer, the Tower's alarm system went off. Robin ran back to his computers.

"Titans! We have an intruder!" Robin shouted urgently. "I'm cutting to the camera feed to see who it is!"

As the feed from the cameras appeared on the large screen, all the Titans dropped what they were doing to watch it. As soon as the picture came into view, a mysterious voice echoed through the air.

**SO I went to Titanz Tower because i was the most powerful superhero in the hole world! I knew that they would want me in ther group!1!**

Beast Boy looked confused. "Dude... what was that?"

"I don't know, BB." Cyborg responded. "I'm just as confused as you are.

Robin continued to stare at the screen. The feed showed a girl around their age. Before Robin could express his opinion on the girl, the voice chimed in again.

**My name is Larissa Diamond Atlantis Brittany Starr, but everyone calls me Rissa. I'm the collest most kawaii person eva! I wear a pink tank top that shows of my big boobs, and a brown jacket like India Jones! I have blue jeans that are riped from lots of battles and stuffs and white high heels that never break because they are undestructable!**

Starfire looked on in a combination of curiosity and confusion. "Why is there a voice telling us about this girl that we have never met before?"

"I have no idea, Star," was all that Robin could say. He was as confused about their whole situation as the rest of the Titans were, but he still tried to keep his composure as leader. Robin spoke into a microphone, projecting his voice through a speaker in the door.

"Who are you? Do you need help?"

The girl spoke up. I am Larissa Diamond Atlantis Brittany Starr, but everyone calls me Rissa. I'm here to join the Ten Titans because I am da best hero ever!1!

Raven approached Robin and finally voiced her opinion. "You know that letting her in here would be a horrible idea, right?"

Robin looked conflicted. I know it seems like a bad idea, but she seems harmless enough. Maybe she can help the team somehow."

Raven shrugged. "Well, who am I to complain? After all, you're the team leader." She walked off, sincerely hoping that Robin would not open the front door.

After much thought, Robin called out to the mysterious girl through the intercom.

"Okay. We'll open the door. This way, we can have a nice talk about your aspirations of being a Titan."

The girl jumped for joy. "OMG i cant beleve im a titan YAY!11!1!1! She squealed as she ran into Titans Tower.

Starfire tilted her head in confusion. "OMG? What language does that word come from?"

Robin just let out a deep sigh. What had he gotten himself into?


	2. Chapter 2: A New Titan?

Chapter 2: A New Titan?

* * *

Robin sat down at a table, while Rissa sat across from him. He had to figure out why she had come to them and, more importantly, why she thought that she was going to be a Titan. He felt sort of awkward, since he felt like he was practically giving a job interview.

"So..." he began, "Why do you want to be a Teen Titan?"

Rissa began speaking extremely quickly. "cuz your like SOOOO cool an stuff n cuz im lik totelly cool 2!"

"...Yes, I guess that being a Titan is pretty cool..." Robin was dumbfounded by her answer. Surely she had to have better reasons than that. Unfortunately, before he could continue, Rissa started rambling again.

"plus im so totally kawai and stuff!11! I shuld be a titan!11!1!"

Robin knew that he had to lay down the law with this girl. "Look, I know that being a Teen Titan seems like it's all fun and games and fighting bad guys, but it takes a lot of work." He spoke slowly and sternly in a desperate attempt to get his message across. "When I look at you, I just think that..."

**Robin sed that he waz lookin at me. I bet it was caus o that tite tank top i had! all da guyz were lookin at it while i was goin to da tower! Also my long blonde hair wad flowin and shining in the light that came thru da windo!**

...Robin had almost forgotten about the horrible unseen narrator...

He managed to regain his composure. "Look, Rissa, I know that you want to be a Titan, but..."

"OMG YAYZ IM A TITAN!11!1!11!" Rissa jumped up and hugged Robin as tight as she could. "THANKS ROBAN!1111!"

"Wait! I was about to say..." Robin tried to talk some sense into the girl, but to no avail. Rissa continued to make her way down the hall, and the random narration made another appearance.

**SO I WAS A TITAN YAY but i still had to unpak so i went to mai room to puit ma stuf away.**

Robin tried to follow her down the hall to explain the situation properly, but by the time he found her again, all the other Titans had found her as well, and they watched as she stood in front of n unfamiliar doorway.

"Uh... was there always a doorway there?' Beast Boy asked.

"I don't remember it." Cyborg replied.

"If there wasn't a door in that spot before, then why is there one now?" Starfire inquired, raising an eyebrow.

Nobody knew the answer, and everyone only became more confused when the door opened to reveal a fully decorated room that none of them had ever seen before.

**There was a rum with postors of al my favrite bands lyk LMFAO an Britney an Justin Beeber!111 i was so happy that they haD a rom just for me1**

The Titans just stood there at a loss for words. None of them understood what was going on, why it was happening, or what they could have possibly done to deserve it.


	3. Chapter 3: Costume Changes and Crime Fig

Chapter 3: Costume Changes and Crime Fighting

* * *

The Titans sat in the main room of Titans Tower, still in shock over the events of the day thus far, which had included a strange girl that thinks she's a Titan, random narration from nowhere, and a room that never existed suddenly existing.

The Titans had come to the conclusion that the narration came from Rissa's mind, seeing as it always described things from her point of view. Apparently, that was her superpower. It wasn't very useful. In fact, it could be outright detrimental in many scenarios. As the Titans dwelled on this discovery, Rissa came into the room.

**I came into the rom. i was wearig a whit LMFAO shirt that said Sexy an I kno it in pink leters with a tan miniskit and spakly pink shoes wit lite blue laces! My long pink hare wet down to my sholdurs and waved back an forth as i waked into the room.**

The Titans looked at her, mainly confused over the fact that her hair had somehow changed color and style within the five minutes since they had last seen her. However, moments after Rissa's inner monologue had stopped projecting itself to everyone in the room, the Titan Alarm went off. Robin rushed to the computer and pulled the source of the trouble on screen.

"Titans, there's trouble in town! See-More is breaking into a bank vault!" Robin spoke with urgency. "We need to get down there, NOW!"

"All rite! time to sho ma skillz!" Rissa shouted excitedly. She followed the rest of the Titans as they made their way to the city.

See-More chuckled as he used his X-ray vision to observe the tumblers in the vault door while he picked the lock. Finally, he lined up the tumblers and opened the door.

"Easy as pie." See-More said to himself as he took a step into the vault.

"Making a withdrawal, See-More?" A familiar voice quipped. See-More looked out from behind the vault door to see the Teen Titans standing in the middle of the room. Robin stood front and center, Cyborg and Beast Boy each stood off to one side, and Starfire and Raven floated overhead.

"Aw, come on, Titans, why can't you just see things my way?" See-More said as he shot an eye blast at the titans. The Titans dispersed and dodged the attack with east

**We wuz fiteing Seemor at the bank caus he was tryin to break intothe valt with his xray eyez!11!1**

See-More looked around. "Who the heck said that?" As he talked, Rissa jumped in front of See-More. Robin smacked his hand against his forehead. He knew that this wouldn't end well.

"U cant win, bank rober!1" Rissa said. See-More looked at her in confusion.

"Okay, who is this chick, and why is she talking weird?" As See-More asked his perfectly legitimate question, Rissa slapped him across the face.

"EVIL BASSTURD1" Rissa yelled in his face. "i wil beet u peemore!" See-More looked at her angrily.

"Peemore? Okay, now I'm offended." See-More fired a barrage of eye blasts from his visor, forcing the Titans to dodge in various directions. One of his blasts hit Rissa and sent her flying back several feet. See-More smiled at the realization that he had hit a Titan, or at least what seemed to be a Titan. Much to the shock of See-More and the Titans, however, Rissa got right back up without a scratch on her.

"U BASARD!1!1! 2 BA HAV SPER POWERS!11!1!11!" Rissa screamed at See-More, who seemed genuinely terrified. Then again, so were the Titans. See-More, after regaining his composure, stepped out from behind the vault door and slammed it shut in disgust.

"You know what? Forget it. I'm going home. It ain't worth having to deal with THAT." He said, pointing to Rissa. He fired an eye blast at the wall, creating a hole to exit from. As he walked, however, Rissa jumped him from behind and began attacking him. The Titans looked on in horror as she repeatedly slammed See-More's head into a wall and kicked him in the groin.

"dats y u dont mak mi angary u dumass." Rissa said to See-More, who was writhing in pain on the ground.

**i bet up seamoar cuz he was a BAD GUY and i hate bad giys an he was tryin to escap!1! I woolda stabed him in da i wit a rock but i didnt cause im a hero!1**

Rissa's inner monologue did nothing to ease the Titan's nerves over the fact that she had just viciously attacked a retreating enemy. Robin made a note to talk to her about it once they got back to the tower.

"da missin is over1" Rissa said cheerily, as if there wasn't a possibly concussed villain on the ground three feet away from her. "i shuld go home an sleep."

The Titans returned home to Titans tower, but not before Robin told the tellers at the bank to call an ambulance for the would-be robber in the vault room. As the Titans prepared to settle in for the night, Raven walked over to Robin in the hallway.

"So, how's the new recruit?" Even though Raven spoke in her usual tone of voice, her words were laced with sarcasm. Robin just sighed and buried his face in his palm.

"You were there, you saw it." Raven shrugged and walked into her room. As Robin walked into his room and closed the door behind him, he reflected on the day, and how things would have probably gone a lot better if he had never let that girl into the tower in the first place.


	4. Chapter 4: An Improbably Tragic Tale

Chapter 4: An Improbably Tragic Tale

Robin woke up the following morning after a difficult sleep. He remembered a strange girl named Rissa who had her own narration, declared herself a Titan, had a room in the tower, and beat up See-More all in one night. Surely it had to be a dream. After all, things like that don't happen, not even to superheroes. His dream theory was shattered when he saw Rissa in the kitchen sitting in front of a very tall stack of waffles. Her hair had somehow changed color yet again, and was now blonde with brown highlights.

**OMG i coldnt beleive it!111 cyborg had made waffles just 4 mi!1!**

Rissa began to eat the waffles very quickly. As soon an she finished the last bite, she got up from the table and went back to her room. At the same time, Cyborg, bottle of syrup in hand, came over to where she had been sitting and looked at the empty plate.

"... She ate my breakfast..." Cyborg said, disappointment apparent in his voice. "... My beautiful Leaning Tower of Waffles..." Starfire walked by as Cyborg was looking brokenheartedly at the plate where his waffle tower once stood. She put a hand on his shoulder.

"It is okay, Cyborg. You can make another Tower of Waffles anytime." She said in an attempt to cheer up her half-mechanical friend.

Robin sat by as the rest of breakfast went on without incident, other than Justin Beiber songs at an exceedingly loud volume that could be heard coming from Rissa's room. Everyone was able to settle into their usual daily routine until lunchtime, when Rissa returned, narration and all.

**i went out 2 da kitchin 4 lunch. i was wearin an pink justun beeber shirt that sad never say nevr on the front. i had a white shot shorts with blue heels. my hair wuz platnim blode wit pink tips an went down to ma back.**

Robin figured that magical color-and-length changing hair must be another power of Rissa's. He needed to know exactly how Rissa got her powers and became... whatever she is.

"So Rissa, tell us a little about yourself. How did you get your powers?" Robin asked. Rissa sat down on the couch while everyone gathered around. Rissa began to talk.

"well when i was growin here in da city up my parents alwas beet me and rapped me and laffed at me an oter stuffs. dey all dyed when the haus caught fire an the fir also spread 2 a hosital an a orpenege 2. evry1 butt me died. I wass por so i had 2 liv on da streets an ppl would beet me up thee 2. every1 always h8ed me becausa i had supre powers. ppl thru bottles an brick an boms at me. i was also kidnaped twice. i decided hat i wante titan when i saw u gaiz put a dad guy in jail."

Everyone stood there speechless. Not only was she becoming even more incomprehensible, but because they had never heard anything quite like the story that she had just told. If she had in fact lived in Jump City beforehand, then they clearly would have been aware of at least one of the events in her story. However, nothing in her tale had ever occurred in the city as far as they knew, particularly the parts about the unreported kidnappings or the civilians throwing bombs.

"Um, are you sure that's right?" Beast Boy asked.

"ov curse it is ITS MY LIFE!1!11!1!1!" Rissa shouted back.

"Calm down..." Robin tried to calm Rissa down after her sudden outburst. "He meant to ask where your powers come from. You didn't tell us that part."

"No I-" Beast Boy was cut off by Cyborg placing his hand over his mouth and making a "Shh" gesture.

"o i always had ma powers i was born wit them." Rissa responded happily.

Nobody responded to her for a few moments. Eventually Raven spoke up. "So, what are your powers?" She said, quizzically raising an eyebrow.

"oh i hav lots of powres. im reely strong an fast and smrt an hawt and reely relly kawaii!1!11!" Rissa replied excitedly. Raven just looked at her, not changing her expression. Robin checked the clock and took note of the time.

"Okay Titans, we've got to train for when the city needs us again. Let's get to the training room." Robin commanded the team. Everyone followed, him to the training room. Raven hung in the back, keeping an eye on Rissa. As they walked, Raven had a single thought in the forefront of her mind.

_There's something not right about that girl._


	5. Chapter 5: Not So Basic Training

Chapter 5: Not So Basic Training

Robin led the Titans (plus Rissa) to the training room. He pressed a button, opening a door leading outside. As they stepped outside, Robin hit a switch that caused many hoops and walls to rise out of the ground, creating a flight training course.

**Robyn pressed sum button an stuff an mad a buncha stuf fly outa da gerund!1!OMGit was so kewl!11!1**

Ignoring Rissa's mental ramblings, the Titans, minus Robin and Cyborg, who cloud not fly, lined up in the order they intended to tackle the course.

Beast Boy went first, transforming into an eagle and navigating the course with ease. He weaved in and out of the obstacles with ease, and let out a victorious cry upon completing the course. Robin clicked a stopwatch to signify the end of Beast Boy's run."45 seconds!" He called out.

Beast Boy transformed back into human form and did a little victory dance. He walked over to the other Titans and grinned. "Bet no one's gonna beat that time, huh?"

Raven ignored him and flew through the course next. She flew through each obstacle effortlessly as her cloak flowed behind her. After crossing the finish line, she slowly floated towards the ground and walked back to the starting line. Robin clicked his stopwatch again and called out the results.

"44 seconds!"

Raven looked at the stunned Beast Boy. "You were saying?" She dismissively said to the green one. Beast Boy folded his arms and pouted. Starfire giggled at her friend's actions as she prepared to run the course.

Starfire flew through the course as if it were nothing. She dodged every obstacle with great timing and never seemed to lose her pace. upon completion, she floated back to her friends to hear the time from Robin. Robin clicked his stopwatch and called out the results of her run.

"43 seconds!"

Starfire smiled. "It looks like we all did very well today." Raven was still silent, and Beast Boy was still pouting. "We should all be happy about our accomplishments."

"MA TERN MA TIRN" Rissa shouted with glee, standing on the starting line. The rest of the Titans looked at her oddly for a moment, primarily due to the fact that she was wearing a different shirt than she was previously, and her hair had become fully blonde and shoulder length again. She had been outside with them the whole time, so there was no way that she had changed her clothes in the past few minutes. Robin noted "quick changing abilities" in his mental list of Rissa's possible posers that he had witnessed, and gave thanks that they didn't have to sit through another of Rissa's brain's lectures this time.

"Um... this is a flyer's course, Rissa. You have to be able to fly." Robin told the girl.

"well duh i no dat sillee" Rissa responded with a grin on her face.

Rendered speechless yet again by Rissa's actions, Robin just shrugged and clicked his stopwatch. "GO!"

Rissa took off flying, leaving a trail of pink sparkles behind her. She flew through each ring and around each wall flawlessly, and seemed to actually gain speed the whole time, even through turns. Once she crossed the finish line, Robin clicked his stopwatch, and was visibly shocked by the results. Nevertheless, he still called out her time.

"40 seconds!"

The other Titans looked on in shock. Rissa had actually outraced then all. SHe stood there with a smile on her face, not speaking, but thinking very loudly.

**YAY I 1 da race!1 an i was relly really alot faster then evry1else 2. they wer so imprezzed!1!1**

Clearly, Rissa was quite full of herself, and she couldn't hide it, what with the self-projecting thoughts and what-not. Robin shook his head in disappointment and called out to the team.

"Okay Titans, back inside! We'll finish training in there!"

The Titans followed Robin back inside to the training room. Robin hit the switch he used to activate the course, and all of the obstacles sunk back into the ground. Satisfied, he closed the door and turned his attention back to the other Titans.

"Listen up, Titans, strength training is next!"

Cyborg rubbed his hands together in anticipation, and began lifting a set of barbells. Starfire did the same, as did Beast Boy, who transformed into a gorilla in preparation for this exercise. Rissa just stood on the sidelines with Robin and Raven while the others worked out. After a few minutes, Robin pressed a button and called out to his teammates.

"OK, no more warm-ups, guys. Time to really get to work." As he said that, a small car was lowered from the ceiling. Cyborg stepped up and grabbed the car with both hands. After exerting a large amount of force, he gradually lifted the car over his head, giving a victorious "Boo-Yah!" before placing the car back on the ground. Starfire also managed to pick up the car, and she managed to do it about as fast as Cyborg did. Beast Boy transformed into a T-Rex and grabbed the car in his teeth, which Robin decided to count as a success. Once those three were finished, Rissa walked over to the car. Robin knew what was about to happen, but he felt compelled to ask anyway.

"Taking the strength test, Rissa?"

"yep im gonna b tha strognest" She replied. She then proceeded to pick up the car with one hand, baffling everyone in the room. She then flung the car into the wall, totaling it and putting a nice-sized dent into the wall as well.

**i thru da car that evry1 was liftin at da wall!1 evry1 was soooooo imprezzed by how strong i waz!1!1**

"...Okay then..." Robin said, trying to get everyone's minds off of the new car-shaped dent in Titan's tower. "Let's go to the simulation room for combat drills." He led the team down the hall into a large room. He pressed a button to close the doors behind them and began typing away at a computer, creating combat scenarios for everyone. He paused for a moment when it came time for him to write a scenario for Rissa, so he looked over his shoulder to ask her about it.

"Hey Rissa, how do you fight?"

"o im da greetest fiter in da hole world" Rissa certainly seemed sure of herself. Robin simply inputted a mixture of ground-based and flying targets for her and pressed a red key on the right side of the console. A siren sounded for a few moments and robotic targets appeared from a trapdoor in the floor. A group of targets then began to rush toward each Titan. The Titans all got into fighting stances and attacked their targets.

Robin used his agility and weapons to attack his targets. Raven threw her targets into each other using telekinesis. Cyborg punched through nearby targets and hit faraway ones with the Sonic Cannon. Starfire flew around the room and shot her targets with starbolts. Beast Boy transformed into a rhinoceros and charged through his targets. Suddenly, Beast Boy was caught off guard when one of his targets exploded in front of his face before he hit it. The other Titans realized this as well, and looked around to see the cause.

Rissa was jumping around the room, destroying targets by spinning at them and shooting pink sparks out of her hands. "take that bichez" She shouted as she destroyed her targets and a fair amount of everyone else's. She then walked over to the other Titans, who were too shocked to speak, and began her brain-monologue again.

**i did da fiteing thingy an did bettr then evry1 as always!111!1 i am so gud at supereo stuffs that i am relay good at it!1!11 al da otter titens thot so 2!1! i culd totelly c it n ther is!111!11**

Robin turned off the combat simulator and reopened the simulation room doors. "OK team, it's getting late. That's enough for today." He winced over the fact that Rissa had damaged the training room, and that they would now not only have to repair the wall, but find a new car for strength training.

"ok c u guys l8r" Rissa pranced out of the room, going off to her room again. The other Titans exited the simulation room and headed for their respective rooms as well.

Raven stayed in the back of the group, thinking about what had occurred that day. Rissa had somehow shown up the rest of the Titans at every single facet of training, and the whole situation just seemed improbable. She entered her room, and looked at the night sky while dwelling on her thoughts.

_She was the fastest flyer, she was the strongest, and she was the best fighter. No one can be that perfect._

_Something's up with that girl, and I'm going to find out what it is._


	6. Chapter 6: Terrifying Transformation

Chapter 6: Terrifying Transformation

The following morning was quite normal for the Titans, save for Rissa's insane monologues. They were actually beginning to tune her out as if her narration was just a regular occurrence, and that disturbed them more than anything else so far. Cyborg, having learned a lesson from the previous morning, made sure not to leave the table until he finished his breakfast, lest he lose it to Rissa again.

Raven sat off to one side, silently observing Rissa. The hooded Titan had noticed something strange about the new arrival. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but something was definitely off.

_It's about time we get to the bottom of the mystery of the "perfect" Titan._

Raven's observations were interrupted, however, by the Titan alarm going off. Everyone dropped what they were doing and gathered around the large monitor while Robin went to the computer to pull up the image. Rissa just stood there looking surprised.

"wats that sound why r wee runnig?" She looked absolutely baffled. Robin sighed and responded.

"It's the Titan alarm. You've heard it before, remember?"

"o ya sry i forgot" Rissa said, once again grinning and bouncing around as usual. An exasperated Robin pulled up the image on the monitor while Raven took notice of the exchange out of the corner of her eye.

_Maybe "perfect" isn't the right word, seeing as she has the intelligence of a grapefruit._

An image appeared on the monitor of the Hive Five robbing a hotel. Gizmo was hacking the lock of the hotel's safe while Billy Numerous created a wall of clones to block the door. Mammoth, See-More, and Kyd Wykkyd were making sure that no one inside tried to stop Gizmo. Robin turned away from the monitor to address the team.

"Titans, the Hive Five is on the loose. It's up to us to stop them." Robin spoke in a dead serious tone, then raised his voice to give his signature command. "Titans, go!"

The Titans all left the tower and raced for the hotel at top speed.

* * *

Billy Numerous absorbed all of his clones back into himself to unblock the hotel's entrance as the rest of the Hive Five casually walked out, each carrying an armload of money. Gizmo looked back and taunted the hotel staff. "Thanks for the cash, losers!" he laughed nastily at the shocked faces of those in the hotel lobby.

"Going somewhere?" A voice rang out.

Gizmo's grin disappeared, and he slowly turned his head back around. The Teen Titans were standing directly in front of him and his gang. He dropped his money and pointed angrily at Robin. "What do you clods think you're doin' here?"

Robin smirked at the diminutive villain. "Oh, we were just in the neighborhood, and we decided to drop-" Robin was rudely interrupted by Rissa jumping out in front of him and yelling at the group of villains.

"we wil defeet u evildoors!1!11!"

Upon seeing Rissa, See-More's pupil turned into an exclamation point before reverting back to normal. He dropped the money he was carrying and let out an irritated groan. "Aw, crap. She's still here?"

Mammoth looked at See-More, then at Rissa. After a few moments, he began to chuckle. "Oh, so _that's_ the girl that beat you up!" He started laughing heartily, which See-More took offense to.

"Hey man, she didn't beat me up! She got a cheap shot!" He tried to defend himself, but Mammoth kept laughing away.

"Sure, buddy. A 'cheap shot'." Mammoth dropped his money as he slapped See-More on the back. Due to the size difference between the two, the slap knocked See-More face down onto the ground.

Kyd Wykkyd simply watched as his teammates argued with each other, not expressing any emotion or getting involved in any way.

Gizmo, feeling the need to get their heist back on track, began yelling at the Titans again. "You do-goodin' snots don't stand a chance, even if you do have some lame-o new Titan!"

In response, Rissa starts squealing at Gizmo's words. "OMG gizmo!111!1! gizmos hear hes so HAWt an SEXIII!11!11"

**we wen 2 a robbaree at a hotel or somethin an i saw GIZMO there!1111! he was reely reelyt all an mussely an his long blode har an blue is was so sexxxy!11111!1!12**

Both the Titans and the Hive Five were utterly dumbstruck by Rissa's gushing over Gizmo. Even Raven and Kyd Wykkyd looked shocked. Beast Boy finally broke the silence after staring at Gizmo for a long time.

"Uh... are we talking about the same Gizmo here?"

Suddenly, Gizmo's body began to change. He began to grow taller and more muscular. His bald head spontaneously grew a full head of luxurious blonde locks. His squinting eyes popped open to reveal dazzling blue pupils. Gizmo had essentially become Fabio in a green jumpsuit.

Gizmo looked at his teammates, then at the Titans, and finally at Rissa. When he saw Rissa, his eyes widened, and he walked over to her. He opened his mouth to speak, and a baritone voice escaped his lips.

"wats ur nam hawty"

Rissa giggled with glee. "im Lariisa Diamond Atlanta Brittnay Starr but u can call mi Rissa"

Gizmo smiled at her. "im Gizmo, da sexest invendor eva"

Rissa batted hey eyelashes at him. "i no"

Rissa jumped into Gizmos arms and they began to kiss loudly and messily, horrifying everyone present. Mammoth was covering his eyes. See-More turned off his visor. Kyd Wykkyd turned the other way and tried to ignore it. Billy Numerous created two clones, and they were all covering each other's eyes and ears. Robin and Beast Boy looked disgusted. Starfire seemed confused. Raven was absolutely stunned. Cyborg looked as though he were scarred for life, and he could only emit one terrified statement.

"Must... wash... eyes..."

Gizmo broke away from kissing Rissa and set her back on the ground. He glared at his Hive Five teammates and shouted angrily at them. "uou evaldoes wil nut eskap1!1!1!"

Mammoth tried to talk to Gizmo. "Hey, buddy. We're on the same side, remember?" Gizmo responded by pulling a tazer off of his back and shocking Mammoth in the neck, bringing the big man down.

Robin looked on as Gizmo attacked his teammates. "What is going on here?"

"Hey, hey, hey! What in tarnation do y'all think you're doin'?" Billy and his clones shouted at Gizmo. Gizmo picked up Billy's two clones and smashed him between them as if he were a cymbal-playing monkey toy.

Kyd Wykkyd said nothing, but took a swipe at Gizmo with his cape. Gizmo dodged and punched Kyd Wykkyd in the face, knocking him out.

See-More was the only villain left standing. He turned his visor on and prepared to attack his rogue ally, but Gizmo just poked him in the eye. "Ow! Watch it, man!" See-More stumbled backwards. Gizmo followed up his attack by throwing a soccerball kick directly into See-More's groin. See-More immediately crumpled to the ground in excruciating pain. "Why does this keep happening?" he said in a strained voice.

Gizmo walked over to Rissa. "i am tita now becuz i am in love wit u Larisa Dimond Atlas Britney Star"

"o gizzo" Rissa said before kissing him again.

The Titans, still utterly baffled by the insanity that had just taken place, returned to Titans Tower with Gizmo in tow, who refused to leave Rissa's side. Nobody was too thrilled by their apparent new addition (other than Rissa, of course).

* * *

The rest of the day was fairly uneventful, but the fact that Rissa was now dating a newly-muscled Gizmo more than made up for it. All of the Titans were extremely wary of Gizmo's actions, but the only things he ever did were spout nonsensical sentences and make out with Rissa. As the Titans were preparing to turn in for the night, Cyborg was sitting on the couch, still refusing to believe the fact that Gizmo was now apparently their ally. Raven was standing nearby, listening to her teammate vent.

"Gizmo... in Titans Tower? One of the good guys? I don't believe it, man. Something is seriously wrong here." Cyborg's tone was one of pure disbelief.

"You're telling me." Raven dryly replied.


End file.
